Hank Miller: American Entrepreneur on Dating in Ukraine, Marriage Agencies, War Safety in Kyiv, and Building 911 Restoration While Living Abroad | Be Yourself Podcast

Be Yourself Podcast

HankMiller

Owner of 911 Restoration — on dating in Ukraine during wartime, whether international marriage agencies actually work, what safety in Kyiv really looks like, and how 15 years of helping hurricane victims for free became a restoration business built entirely on purpose

50 minutes

Ukraine · Dating · Entrepreneurship · Adventure · Mold Removal · War

Watch on YouTube 911 Restoration

About This Episode

What Does an American Entrepreneur Do When He Lands in Ukraine — and Decides to Stay?

Hank Miller did not plan to fall in love with Ukraine. He was on his way to Frankfurt. Something felt off the moment he landed in Germany — he couldn't explain it — and on the advice of a Ukrainian woman at an information desk, he changed his ticket and flew to Kyiv. That was 2020, right at the start of COVID. He stayed in Dnipro for over two weeks. He came back twice more. And then the war started, and people told him he was crazy.

He came anyway. This is the fourth time. He is speaking to Serhiy from Skyoff Hotel in Kyiv, and somewhere between the business and the personal, this conversation turns into something rarer — an honest account of what Ukraine looks like from the outside. Hank talks about what it felt like to sit in an empty bomb shelter while the alarm went off and the streets outside were still full of people. He talks about dating Ukrainian women, about one relationship with a refugee in Munich that lasted two years and was, by his own account, the best two years of his life. He talks about marriage agencies, about the stigma, about his friends texting him warnings, and about why he believes the stigma tells you more about the people who hold it than about Ukrainian women themselves.

And then, almost as a footnote, he mentions that the Ukrainian government contacted him to investigate an agricultural mold crisis in the Carpathian region — because they couldn't find anyone in Ukraine with his level of expertise. He is also the man who spent 15 years driving into hurricane disaster zones, knocking on strangers' doors, and spending days tearing out their damaged walls for free — until he realized he could do this as a business. That is 911 Restoration. That is Hank Miller.

What 911 Restoration actually does — the invisible battle against mold, bacteria, and biohazards

Hank runs a 911 Restoration franchise in Virginia, part of a 100+ branch national network. His team of nine specialists handles water intrusion, mold detection and removal, biohazard cleanup — and yes, crime scene cleanup. If your air conditioning vents have black around the edges, he says, that's already mold.

How Ukraine got onto Hank's radar before the war — a chance ticket change and a stranger's advice

In early 2020, Hank changed his Frankfurt flight on the recommendation of a Ukrainian airport worker and ended up in Dnipro for over two weeks. He came back twice more during COVID, met government contacts by accident, and was eventually hired to investigate a national agricultural mold problem in the Carpathian region.

Living in Kyiv during wartime — what safety actually looks like on the ground

Hank describes spending three days in Kyiv before he saw a single sign of war. The streets were full. The mall was packed. Then at midnight, the alarm went off — he went down to an empty bomb shelter, came back up, and lit a cigar. He talks about why curiosity, not judgment, is the only honest lens for understanding a place you've never been.

Do Ukrainian dating agencies actually work? — a firsthand account with both sides of the story

Hank tried the agency route, got burned once by a money-hungry match, then found a legitimate site and spent nearly two years with a Ukrainian refugee living in Munich. He talks candidly about the stigma in America, the difference between a bad agency and a bad person, and what it felt like to be introduced to her parents — which, he learned, is a very big deal.

Ukrainian women and family values — what Hank observed across years of relationships and friendships

Hank shares his view that Ukrainian women are raised to be family-oriented in a way that is increasingly rare in American culture. He is direct about American women being, in his words, spoiled — and equally direct that Ukrainian women are not without their own complexities. But the consistent thread he's encountered: when safety and love are present, the commitment is unlike anything he found at home.

How Hank started his business — 15 years of free hurricane disaster relief that became a company

For 15 years, Hank loaded his truck with tools and water after every hurricane on the East Coast, drove into devastated neighborhoods, knocked on doors, and helped strangers clean up their homes. He charged nothing. He gave away his own clothes. Eventually he realized this passion could become a profession — and that is how 911 Restoration was born.

About the Guest

Hank Miller — Owner of 911 Restoration, Adventure Seeker, and the American Who Keeps Coming Back to Ukraine

Hank Miller owns a 911 Restoration franchise in Virginia Beach, Virginia — part of a 100+ branch emergency restoration network specializing in water intrusion, mold detection and removal, biohazard cleanup, and disaster response. He built his business on a foundation that most people would call unusual: for fifteen years before going professional, Hank drove into hurricane disaster zones on the U.S. East Coast with a truck full of tools and supplies, knocked on strangers' doors, and spent days helping them tear out and rebuild their damaged homes — for free, with no agenda. When manufacturers and his own experience eventually showed him there was a business in what he was already doing for love, 911 Restoration became the channel for that passion.

Hank has been to Ukraine four times. The first was in 2020, more or less by accident — a ticket change on the advice of a stranger at the Frankfurt airport. He ended up in Dnipro for over two weeks, then came back twice more during COVID, meeting government contacts along the way. When the war started and his friends told him he was crazy for wanting to return, he came anyway. He is currently in Kyiv, partly for personal reasons and partly because the Ukrainian government hired him to investigate an agricultural mold crisis in the Carpathian region — a project that was eventually paused due to the war and recently resumed.

Hank has navigated the world of Ukrainian dating agencies with honesty about what went wrong and what went right. A two-year relationship with a Ukrainian refugee in Munich — which ended not in betrayal but in mutual love and circumstance — showed him what he had suspected: that the reputation of the Slavic dating world says more about the people doing the judging than about the women being judged.

Who He Is

Owner of a 911 Restoration franchise in Virginia Beach — emergency water intrusion, mold removal, and biohazard cleanup. Part of a national network of 100+ branches. His team personally consists of nine certified specialists governed by IICRC standards.

Why He Is in Ukraine

Fourth visit to Ukraine. Currently in Kyiv for two reasons: a personal relationship with a Ukrainian woman he has known for nearly a year, and a professional engagement — the Ukrainian government hired him to take ground samples in a Carpathian agricultural region suffering from an unidentified mold crisis.

The Defining Story

For 15 years, Hank drove into hurricane disaster zones after every East Coast storm — tools, water, and old clothes packed into his truck — and helped devastated families rebuild for free. No agenda. No payment. Just a man who likes making people's lives easier. That habit became 911 Restoration.

His Philosophy

Be curious, not judgmental. You can't judge something you haven't lived. Whether it's Ukraine under wartime, Ukrainian women, or dating agencies with a bad reputation — Hank's rule is the same: go there, experience it firsthand, then decide. Everything else is someone else's perception.

Key Quotes

The Slavic world has had such a bad reputation. Oh my goodness. For order brides. Horrible reputation. Because historically people think that they will only rip you off. That's it. That's it.

Hank Miller

I spent almost 2 years with her. We were totally in love and it was the best two years of my life.

Hank Miller

I like making people's lives easier. I'm passionate about that. I don't care about anything in return. I like to give and don't receive.

Hank Miller

Episode Chapters

0:00 In this Episode 2:16 What 911 Restoration Really Does 9:27 How Ukraine Caught Hank's Attention — Even Before the War 17:46 Why Hank Chose Adventure Over a 'Normal' Life 26:49 Do Ukrainian Dating Agencies Actually Work? 37:30 How Hank Started His Own Business

Full Transcript

BTW: This episode of the Be Yourself Podcast is produced by Beverly Media. Want a podcast that looks and sounds this good? Check out Beverly Production →

0:00 In this Episode

Hank The Slavic world has had such a bad reputation. Oh my goodness. For order brides. Horrible reputation. Because historically people think that they will only rip you off. That's it. That's it.

Serhiy Exactly.

Hank I spent almost 2 years with her. Wow. We were totally in love and it was the best two years of my life.

Serhiy That's something that can waver negative experience. Absolutely. And you know if if a Ukrainian woman introduces you to her parents, it's a big deal.

Hank That's correct. How knowledgeable are people about the problem? The most common call that we get is that I'm sick all the time. When I'm in this building, when I leave this building, I'm fine. After you've identified the problem, only then you commence solving the problem.

Serhiy Exactly. The Ukrainian government, they had put a request out. They needed help people that in my industry to help them figure out what is hurting the crop.

Hank Your reputation speaks for itself.

1:08 Introduction

Serhiy Hello everyone. Welcome to the Be Yourself podcast, the podcast on expressing our true selves. Today my guest is Hank Miller who is an owner of 911 restoration. It's an emergency water intrusion services and he's right now in Kyiv Ukraine and we're talking from the Skyoff Hotel. Hey man.

Hank Hey. Nice to see you. Yeah, nice to uh have this uh chat with you. How are you? I'm doing well. Thank you. Doing well. Love it. Love it here.

Serhiy What's How long have you been in Kyiv?

Hank I've been here for almost a week now. Almost a week. And are what's this? Is this not the first time that you have come here? No, this is the fourth time I've been to Ukraine. I actually came here three times during COVID. First time I came uh by accident and I loved it so much. Ended up in Dnipro and loved it so much that uh I came back two more times and met some government people by accident uh who were friends of friends and um they invited me to help them with their agricultural mold issues that they have.

2:16 What 911 Restoration Really Does

Serhiy So tell me a little bit more about the company because uh from the name it's not self-explanatory. Well, it's self-explanatory — 911 restoration emergency. But what exactly do you guys do and how big is your business in the United States?

Hank Yeah. So, uh we specialize in really it's a battle of the unseen. In other words, people get sick and it's not because they took something tangible and stuck it in their mouth and got sick. It's because they breathed it in or they touched something and touched their mouth. And so that created an illness inside their body. Their body couldn't fight it and so it had to — when it couldn't reject it, it then came in and it made you sick. Whether it's a common cold, whether it was COVID, whether it was food poisoning or any of those things. That has caused um you know illnesses all over the place. So we battle against all those unknown and unseen micro infections, microbials and infections and viruses and bacterias and um I mean there's 101,000 types of molds just in my area in the United States.

Serhiy How knowledgeable are people about the problem? Because I think that you know there are businesses that deal with an existing problem that everyone understands and there are markets where you have to educate people to actually get some interest in your services. Is that something that you're continually doing — educating people? Because when you told me that this is a four-star hotel and Hank told me that it's still not up to the standards — do you do some educating as you go?

Hank Absolutely. I mean, everybody wants to know. The most common call that we get is that I'm sick all the time when I'm in this building. When I leave this building, I'm fine. And so, that is how the discussion usually begins. And so, uh, from that, you got to expound on what's going on. And you can't — there's no absolutes in this business. Not until you test. So, in other words, I can walk in your house and we can see mold up on the wall and you can say, is this mold? I'm going to tell you — I can say it's mold, but until I actually test it and send it to a certified lab that will microscope it and test it and make sure and identify exactly what it is, then I can come back to you and say, "Yes, this is mold." So, that's what you do. You have uh people who first test, analyze. Yes. And after you've identified the problem, only then you commence solving the problem.

Serhiy Exactly. So when we know exactly what's going on and we know exactly the problem then we can eradicate. So what are the leading causes of health issues in water?

Hank Moisture. I mean mold can grow uh and can form in two ways. So mold is everywhere. It's inside your house. It's outside your house. Your duct system — we actually that's part of our process. And so if you look around your vents, you'll probably see some dust on your vents or black areas around your vents. Guaranteed that's mold. And so mold stays dormant — it's everywhere and it won't affect you while it's just sitting there. But when it does affect you and the reason it comes to life — mold is actually uh it doesn't have a nervous system. It is a live animal, but it doesn't have a nervous system. So, it can die and come back and die and come back and die and come back. And so, uh, in that process, we have to hunt down the moisture problem. You say, Hank, I don't — there's no water in my house. There's no leaks anywhere. Well, guess what? The humidity in the air, humidity is moisture. And that humidity is enough to activate that mold and to bring it back to life. And that's why you have it in your air conditioner.

Serhiy Further, what type of specialists do you have on your team and how big is your team and how many offices or branches do you have?

Hank Yeah, so there's uh over 100 branches in the United States. Um, yeah, my team personally, uh, we have about nine people. Uh, we have, and so there's a certification in the United States, it's governed by an overseeing body called the IICRC. They are the ones who write the laws and the rules on how to identify and remove. So, sanitization rule book. Exactly. And that's the basis, the scientific basis for getting rid of viruses, bacteria, mold, all that. They are the center for who or how to identify and how to write protocol on how to remove, you know, all these bad organisms.

Serhiy You even told me off the record that when there's a crime like a homicide, your company helps clean things up.

Hank It's called biohazard. Biohazards could be um you know crime scene cleanup where people are shot, blood is shed, um body remains. Uh bad term though is rotten bodies that have been sitting in a home for a couple weeks before they're identified. Um and also your toilet overflowing. That's in the same category. And so very dangerous stuff.

Serhiy So you have contractors in your branches because you said that you have nine people on the team but obviously nine people cannot manage so many branches.

Hank No no no we have nine in my local branch the one that I actually oversee. So we have 911 restoration offices across the country. Each office has their own team. So you have one in Virginia specifically.

9:27 How Ukraine Caught Hank's Attention — Even Before the War

Serhiy So that's a good transition I think to ask you about Virginia and uh how did you end up? First of all, you said that you were here before COVID. It's not like the war in Ukraine was something that put us on your map because a lot of Americans started paying attention to Ukraine right after the war broke out. So you did it before — even before war. So can you tell me about how you found out about our country and uh is it is it solely traveling purposes or or something else?

Hank Well, so the first time I the first trip that I made here was all by accident. I was actually planning on a trip to Frankfurt, Germany, and I wanted to travel through that region of the world. I've never been there before. I wanted to see Germany, you know, in that area. And so when I got there, something didn't feel right. There was something in the air. I don't know what it was, but I just I didn't feel right. I felt very uncomfortable. And so I went up to the information counter and I told the lady I said tell me somewhere that would be nice to go visit right now, and she said Ukraine. And she said uh well I'm from Ukraine. She goes you should go see Ukraine. It's a beautiful country and here I am thinking you know Russian, and you know who knows whether it's safe or not, or one of those like Serbia kind of countries. That was back in 2019. Or yeah, right before COVID — COVID had just started. Okay. I think COVID was identified in February and I this was May. And so she said you should go to Kyiv. And so I opened up my phone and looked at the map and I asked very clearly — I remember clearly — is it safe there? She goes oh my god you'll have so much fun there. Go to Ukraine. I said, okay, here — change my ticket. And so I ended up in Kyiv. I was at the airport and I didn't know whether I should stay in Kyiv. The country's huge. So I went to the counter again and I asked the lady, I said, uh, where should I go visit? And I ended up in Dnipro. That was my first place. I thought that was gonna be a great place — it was just a gut feeling.

Serhiy What was the experience? What was the first impression? Why did you fell in love?

Hank I got to Dnipro. I got an Airbnb. I had one suitcase in my hand and I ended up staying there for over two weeks. That's how great it was. What was interesting is that I actually felt very awkward the first day, like a little intimidated actually because I go out of my room and I'm walking down the street and everybody — not even some people — even the beautiful women, they were sitting there staring at me. Everywhere I went, men and women were staring at me like I couldn't decide whether they wanted to kill me or they wanted to love me. So, you stood out somehow. I stood out like a complete foreigner, which now I understand. I'm dressed in tan and brown and blue and you are in black like everybody else in this country. And my hair looks like Hollywood. It was obvious. But I'm here. Love me or hate me, but I'm here. And so thankfully you've been experiencing love rather than hate. Absolutely.

Serhiy This is something very important that uh the message that I keep on sending to all of the foreigners listening to my podcast is that even right now it's safe in Kyiv and it's fun in Kyiv and a lot of people don't understand how come we're having fun while during the wartime — to which I always say it's the best time to actually live your life to the fullest because you don't know when your life's going to end. So, I mean, let's face it, we have shelling still. We have air pretty solid air defense system, but still, you never know. And war has restarted lives of so many of us and we started living the life to the fullest and not putting it on the shelf. That's right.

Hank So, it's interesting because uh I was contacted by the Ukrainian government about maybe uh December of 24. They wanted me to come and help with uh with their crops. They had a mold issue. Um and it was almost in the Carpathian Mountains in that area.

Serhiy Which government called? The Ukrainian government. The American embassy or—

Hank Well, no. They had put a request out. They needed help, people that in my industry to help them figure out what is hurting the crop.

Serhiy Interesting. We don't have people of this caliber in Ukraine. They couldn't figure it out. So, they were outsourcing. Of course, they go to America to find that out. That's cool. So that's actually makes you one of the best specialists if they found you. Your reputation speaks for itself probably.

Hank Okay. And so they had planned for February and uh February is not a great month for hunting down these type of things because a lot of the microorganisms will go dormant in the cold weather. And so the day approached and I was supposed to come here, they cancelled — they postponed. Uh it wasn't a good time. I guess they were having uh there was a lot of stuff going on with the war and this was not as important. So they postponed it. They said we will we promise we will call you back. We don't know when but we will call you back. Well about a month ago I get a call and says uh can you come out now? So that's why I came out this time. Um and so I was able to help with uh with the agricultural issues they're having. I spent a day um in the field um in a small town. I can't really tell you where that is. But it is an area that they needed assistance. So I took uh samples, ground samples and different various samples that I will take back to the United States and we will test it and determine exactly what's going on.

Serhiy This is something that in a way bridges the gap between our countries. This type of problem that we cannot solve ourselves. That's why we were looking for help. And let's face it, during the war, a lot of our pilots have been having trainings. I heard a friend of mine, he's got a relative in Denver, and he says that Ukrainian pilots are flying over Denver.

Hank Yeah, my son lives in Denver. He told me the same thing. He told me that there's a lot of war planes flying over Denver. So, uh, that's so cool that our countries are cooperating and that brings our people closer to each other. I did come as a private sector though — I did not come as anyone related to the government.

17:46 Why Hank Chose Adventure Over a 'Normal' Life

Serhiy Okay, let's shift gears a little bit to more of a personal life, man, because my podcast is called Be Yourself. It's about finding your path in life and not betraying your values regardless of what people say. Do what you want. That's what I stand by. In you — I asked you yesterday if you would call yourself an adventure seeker to which you said absolutely yes. So if you were to describe your personality, what would you say are one, two, three main traits that made you this adventure seeker and that not made you sit at home and just uh live a normal American life?

Hank Yeah. So uh for me I've always asked so many questions when I go into a new uh environment or a new place. Like I could sit here and I could question you. Oh, really? You could — we can change places. Absolutely. I would because I want to know everything I can know about something. And so I asked questions and I read when I was a little kid and I'll never forget this — that I read in a book that um if you don't ask you'll never know. And you can never ask too many questions. People may get frustrated with your questions over and over but at the same time you are constantly learning when you are asking questions. So number one — curiosity. Curiosity. And then I wanted to know as if I was going to jump into a situation, I want to know everything about it I can. And so it's just like this thing with the war. People said I was crazy. And it happened with COVID too. When I came over here during COVID, people said, "Are you crazy? It's loaded with COVID and you don't want to travel during COVID." And so this time when I came, I posted on my Facebook page. I said, "Hey, I'm going to Ukraine," and all my close friends said, "Are you crazy? Are you nuts? What are you — are you just signing up for a death sentence?"

Serhiy Oh my goodness. I know.

Hank And I said to myself, these guys are idiots. How can you say that? All you hear is what's on the news. You have no idea what it's like. People in Kharkiv and Sumy and all these places where they were bombed constantly and you see pictures of devastated buildings and flattened communities and all that — they're still living there. People are still living there. You see one building that's blown up and flattened and you think the whole place is bad and it's all dangerous. And so I'm not that type. I have no judgment in my life. You can tell me the worst of the worst and I will not change my thought about you unless it's something that offends me personally. And so I decided instead of listening to all the American media, which is most of it's full of crap, I decided no, I'm not going to place judgment on what I think. I'm going to Kyiv. That's the capital of Ukraine. I know what it was like when I came during COVID and I'm going to come here during the war and if I got to sit in a bomb shelter the whole time, I'm going to do it. But I want to be here. I want to experience firsthand the fear that the typical Ukrainian citizen felt the first time they saw that convoy of hundreds of Russian tanks coming down the road headed for Kyiv.

Hank It took me three days and nights in Kyiv before I saw any sign of it. The streets are loaded with people. The mall is jam-packed. There's thousands of cars going up and down the road like a 7 million people population city. They thrive, they live, they're living to the fullest. And so they are living life as if it's just another day in Kyiv. And so I started exploring. I started driving around and uh I hired a taxi to take me around and look around and see things. And I knew somebody here, good friend. And so I've spent time with them as well. And we've had a great time together. And so I'm sitting there and now it's midnight two nights ago and all of a sudden the alarm goes off. I didn't even know what this sounded like after 3 days here and the security from the hotel came out to me and said, "Hey, the alarm's going off. Let me show you where the bomb shelter is in our building." So he takes me down there. He looks around. There's not anybody in this bomb shelter. The alarm's been going off for 15 minutes. I'm thinking this is about as serious as it gets right here. I come back. He said, "If you want to stay here, go ahead." I said, "No, I'm going to come back up here." I came back to the lobby and came out and lit my cigar.

Serhiy Yeah, man. This is crazy. I mean, not that we should underestimate the war, but it might sound a bit shocking to you guys, but the level of sensitivity has fallen dramatically. Absolutely. In this respect. And uh I mean as I said earlier, we're pretty much — we're not fatalists, but we're pretty much okay there. I heard that there's more chance right now to die in a car crash rather than get hit by a rocket. So you get used to everything. And yeah, that's just the fact of the matter. You get used to everything. And even such a horrendous thing as bombing of your city, you can get used to it as well. Now I would say that you get used to it until you are that victim — someone or a neighbor.

Hank Yes. And so the my friends that I have here, I've actually said, "Please be careful when you go out." And she'll say, "Oh, it's okay. Everything's fine." I'm like, "Don't underestimate anything." But they — after three years they become so familiar with the alarms going off and nothing going wrong, that um that it's just a way of life now. It's just part of it. And if I go, I go — I'm going to go some way, right? But I'm not going to be fearful. I'm not going to run from the enemy because I'm going to live my life the way I live.

Serhiy I want to roll back to what you said about not laying judgment. I remember this quote by Walt Whitman. Have you watched Ted Lasso? Oh yeah. This guy — he received even some kind of award because what they were able to accomplish was stunning. No one expected this from a TV show but they actually showed how to be good people, you know, and Ted Lasso is just a manifestation of how you're not judging others. His favorite quote is by Walt Whitman — be curious, not judgmental. And that exactly what you're talking about. So, whatever people say to you and you feel like you don't understand and you want to hate or you want to cast aspersions rather than judging or putting a label, dig deeper. That's right. Ask more questions.

Hank So for me, it's not fair for me to judge you if I don't know you. For me to listen to my friend tell me about you and your issues — that's wrong. That's their perception. I need to find my own perception. I need to know for myself what's right and what's wrong. And so I will never take somebody else's word for it. You can tell me what you think it might be like in Kyiv, but until I come here and see for myself, there's no way that I'm going to perceive it as what you think.

26:49 Do Ukrainian Dating Agencies Actually Work?

Serhiy I'm going to ask you more something. On a personal front, okay, Ukraine and let's let's put it this way — Eastern Europe has become a destination or a place to go for foreigners from all around the world to potentially find the love of their life and to find someone to have family with. I mean that's something that I can say without a shadow of the doubt. I mean I know that we have a lot of bright agencies right and regardless of how you view that it works — therefore it's successful and that's why that phenomena exists. Can you tell me if you had some experience with this type of agencies or maybe websites, right? And give us more of a helicopter view because I know that you know lies that so that we have established this kind of uh reputation.

Hank Yeah. Yeah. So for years it's been a it's been a judgmental battle in at least in my country uh because the Slavic world has had such a bad reputation. Oh my goodness. For order brides, you know, for you know the brides are on a menu. You go down the list, you pick one that looks nice. Horrible reputation because historically people think that they will only rip you off. That's it. That's it. Exactly. That's right. And that's still very prevalent in the United States. And so even my friends have said, "You be careful." I can show you a text from from yesterday of a friend of mine on my phone who said, "Be careful of her." Okay. Right. So that's the world that I live in. That's the stigma. And so again, if you haven't tried it or if you're happily married in America, that's great. You can think that. But until you live that out, you don't know. And yes, there are cases where there's been a very huge corruption in that industry and I get it. So that's why you've got to do your own research and your own homework. If I get ripped off then I get ripped off — but then does that mean that I'm not going to do it again? Does that mean that there's other agencies that are still bad or are they all bad or are there still some legitimate good agencies? And so I went down that road a couple years ago and yes there was one agency and I can't even blame the agency because I — I can blame the girl that I met. That is one thing I can say.

Serhiy Well agencies should do some let's call pre-qualification.

Hank Well they do but the pre can be a little bit as well because all they do is verify that the woman is real. They check her passport and check a box and say, "Yep, she's been verified." But they don't know criminal backgrounds. They don't know whether they're honest or dishonest. They just put her online. So anyway, I happened to meet one that was very money hungry. American came over. And so the stigma actually — it was very legit. Confirmed itself. Absolutely. So here I am. But then uh but then I found a legitimate site which is a little bit more difficult. I did my homework. I actually met a woman on this site and ended up — not living with her, but — she was a Ukrainian refugee that moved to Munich, Germany. And I spent almost two years with her. Wow. We were totally in love and had a great great — it was the best two years of my life.

Serhiy Wow. That's something that can waver negative experience. Absolutely.

Hank And so, call it what you want, but I found one that I could have ended up with the rest of my life. Unfortunately, you know, she had family issues and things and we had to part as friends, but we left telling each other we loved each other and we wish each other well. Great relationship. So, how old was she? 36. 36. Yeah. I'm 60. A little awkward. Uh but it is what it is. And so, uh she cared about me so much. I mean, first thing she did is introduced me to her parents. And you know, if if a Ukrainian woman introduces you to her parents, it's a big deal.

Serhiy It's a big deal. That's correct. Big big festival or you know, food food.

Hank They gave me a Ukrainian shirt with the design on the shirt. I mean, it was it was just a great great experience. Very valid. Very very uh very good relationship. Much better than I would ever found in the United States.

Serhiy And you decided to give it a second try, which is admirable. Yeah. Right. A lot of people they pretty much mark things with a certain color after one experience and not giving it second chance. That's right. Which is a mistake.

Hank Yeah. Absolutely. Because uh people are um — life in the world is never black and white and people are never black and white. Never. And we want to say it's either black or white because it's easier for us to understand. But there's so much gray color in the middle. There's so many things.

Serhiy Would you say that Ukrainian women have more traditional views on on starting and running a family?

Hank Absolutely. I believe that uh no matter how a woman or a man turns out when they grow up that they are taught — if they live with parents who love them — that the woman will be raised and taught how to love a man later in life. So that's part of their growing up. That's part of the process as a child — that the parents teach them through their own actions, their own interactions with their spouse. If the role models are messed up — that's correct. Right. I know another thing about children. I don't have children, but I was told that children, they never do what they're told to do, but they will copy exactly what they see. That's right. That's right. That's why you should lead by example. Exactly. And so uh I've learned that that's very valid. I mean, anybody I've met, it's like that.

Hank In America, and I'm not saying all American women are like this, but at least the last 50 I've known, um, they're spoiled. American women are spoiled rotten. And so they expect things. There's a characteristic that Ukrainian women are after men, Americans' money. Well, American women are after Americans' money. Trust me. I mean, it's no different. And so, but I don't believe that about Ukrainian women. Maybe there's a few bad apples out there, but the average Ukrainian woman is all about the family. The family is the most important thing with or without any money. If they have love and security and they know that they're safe, they will love you like none other.

Serhiy And uh I can say from the standpoint of a Ukrainian male that we've been spoiled. And uh Hank told me that some of the ladies that he dated, they actually told him that some Ukrainian men were abusive, right? And and toxic. And I don't want to generalize. Definitely we do have bad apples. But I can see why Ukrainian women value Americans because of the treatment they give to them. Probably we might sometimes be too spoiled having so many beautiful women. It's not — Hank told you that American ladies are also beautiful. But I mean, my god, guys, sometimes when you walk the streets of Kyiv, it's just unfair.

Hank Absolutely. But you know, you can go to — I live in Virginia Beach, which is right on the Atlantic Ocean. And so, you go to the beach and you're going to see millions of beautiful women there, too. So, they're everywhere. But what what separates to me what separates an American woman from a Ukrainian woman is her desire to please her husband and to provide a loving, caring family. It's really interesting because when I do meet a Ukrainian woman, she will — one of the first things she'll tell me is, "I'm a great cook." Oh my god. It's almost as if she's trained as a child. Her mother tells her, "You must learn to cook well — that will keep your husband at home and will keep him happy."

Serhiy Well, we have a saying that goes something like that — that the key to the heart of a man is his stomach. Yeah, I get that.

37:30 How Hank Started His Own Business

Serhiy I think I want to ask you one of the signature questions of my show because before you can be yourself, you have to find yourself and to be your authentic self, you have to find what really speaks to your heart. So for you it's uh being curious, traveling the world, finding out, learning more about people and cultures. But in terms of making money, do you agree that we can transform a hobby into our profession? And the second one is — how did you start your business?

Hank It's a great question because that's something you don't know anything about me and it answers that question directly. So here you go. So I have always loved helping people. Even as a teenager I would help my friends who had to cut the grass in their yard. I would go over there and say, "Hey man, let me push the mower. I want to do it." And I love doing it. And why do I like doing it? Because I like making people's lives easier. I'm passionate about that. That's my thing. Like with something difficult — not with something that takes the laws off their shoulder. No, it's all because I want to help them make their life easier. And I don't care about anything in return. I like to give and don't receive. There's nothing about I — I don't — I could care less if I tell you, "Hey man, you're a great guy. I'm outstanding. I want to be your friend forever." And you just say, "Okay." I could take that as an insult or I could just walk away and be okay with it. But I put out what I felt and whether you receive it or not, it doesn't matter to me because I'm okay either way. I just want you to know that I am here for you if you ever need me.

Hank Okay. So, with that said, as I grew up — we have hurricanes on the east coast of the United States all the time, during from June until October. And so these storms can come into areas and just flatten. Oh my goodness. Wipe them out. Or even worse, instead of flattening the houses, it will flood them. These are two three-story homes and the water will come up into the second floor. I even went to a storm about 12 years ago that they had to cut the roof out of the house for people to get out of the house to rescue them. The water was that high — it went up three stories. They had to go through the roof to get out of their homes.

Hank And so for years, after a storm, I would load my truck full of supplies like cases of water, tools — I do construction by trade. And so I would take tools and supplies and all kinds of things that you could need in a disaster zone. And what I would do is I would drive into these communities and I would just drive up and down the streets and when something inside my heart said stop here, I would stop here. I would get out of my truck and I would walk to the door, knock on the door and the people may be inside crying or just their whole life is devastated. And so, I would tell them, "My name is Hank and I want to introduce myself. You might think this is strange, but I just felt like I should stop here at your house and help you clean up your house." And you would get — I can't tell you the number of types of looks that you would get. But once they're convinced and they knew that I was trustworthy and that I meant what I said, their house was open, their family was open, and I would go in there and spend three, four days with all my tools, tearing out the inside of their homes, running all the trash to the streets, doing all that stuff, giving them water. My wife at the time, she would load my truck with all my old clothes so that I could take and give people clothes if they needed it while I was there. And so even my favorite things, we would just give them away because they needed it. I didn't need it. They needed it and I was there to help them and I would just serve them. And so I did that for probably 15 years.

Serhiy Wow. And then I realized that I could get into the business and make money doing it. Do you have goosebumps? I mean, this means that I really really uh resonate with what you're saying because this is a testament that you are a pure heart and you really — but it seems to me that people never want to believe that you're just there — you're there without any agenda, right? And that's something that I wish didn't exist in us, but this uh someone who doesn't believe — non-believer believes in us. But do you know why that is?

Hank It's because you've been abused your whole life mentally, emotionally, you've been abused your whole life to believe not to trust, to believe that somebody's got an alternative motive, to believe that somebody wants something in return. They don't understand the few people in this world that don't want anything in return — could care less about getting anything back in return. There's virtually very few. This was something that I learned over my life and that I've lived this life now for the last 20 years like this — where I will if I've only got five — you need some money right now. I'll give you the rest of my money in my pocket right this second. I mean, and I wouldn't even blink an eye.

Serhiy My one of my podcast guests Allan Langanger he owns Seven Secret Sales Academy. He's a trainer and goes around the country and teach his people sales. He's got a book and the main principle of his book, the first principle is help not sell. Help not sell. I think I have this feeling that you have been successful with your business because you're also not intrusively trying to sell. You're just helping and people know that hey there's this guy Hank who I can recommend. Because he really wants to help. By the way, he can charge you for that, but it's not like you will rip them off. And uh this is so admirable and I've been trying to uh build my business like that. Even when for example the customer doesn't need my specific services, you know what we can do? We can say no, let's just not work together, or I can think of someone who can actually help them. And you can refer that person without any absolutely uh reward for me.

Hank Finder's fee. And that's a game changer, man. Yeah, that's a game changer. And uh I think it takes longer. It might take longer. It probably generally takes longer to build a career or business like that because other people who are engaged in some manipulation techniques, they might have a faster result, but all these results will be fake and temporary. What we're doing — we're building long lasting relationships with people and long lasting relationships will deliver you business down the road 100%. That's right.

Hank So, just give you a quick social uh example of this. So, I'm speaking to this woman here as I told you and I'm spending time with her. I've known her for almost about nine or 10 months now. We've talked almost every day for that long. We video back and forth, you know, FaceTime. Back and forth regularly. And so we see each other. We've known each other. We've interacted with each other. But then when I met her for the first time face to face, she was not this person that I had interacted with for all this time because she went right into survival mode. She went into — what does he want from me? I'm a beautiful woman. What does he want from me? He thinks that I'm just some easy Ukrainian woman. And this is her perception. I can read her and this is what she's thinking — that he's after something. So, she's very introverted in our interactions at first because all the things that she learned about me over the months — now we're face to face. She's not hiding behind a screen anymore. Now I'm real and now she thinks I'm just the next guy on the street.

Hank And so it took me time for her to see — and she's still learning — that I don't come with any agenda. I don't come to steal her for the night or the weekend. That I am here for the lifelong run. And she's learning that everything that I say is 100% honest and truthful and that she can count on me for her well-being, for her safety, for her child's well-being and her safety. And that I'm a man of integrity and somebody that's going to do everything that I say I do. And so the problem is that the past boyfriends, the past husbands, the the trials in life that failed — all those things are things that we carry with us. And if we can learn to lay those things down at our next relationship, whether it's just friends like you and me or whether it's a sexual relationship or whatever — whatever the relationship is — we cannot bring our past into the present.

Serhiy Well, it's in a way it uh speaks to uh this naivity — I'm not sure if there's a word like that — naive nature of the person. If you are — I think you can be lightly naive and it will play to your advantage because if you're skeptical all the time and you carry the bag from the past, it's a burden from the past. It will not give you a chance to find love, to find happiness, to find new friends, and it's not fair to the person you're interacting with because now you've placed all this past judgment on your new relationship and so it already starts out in jealousy and you already finished before you start.

Serhiy A last word from you — maybe look directly into the camera and say anything you want to say to your American friends or people in Ukraine.

Hank Hey guys, so uh especially for my golfing friends. I love to play golf and uh all you guys said that I was crazy for coming here. I got news for you. You're all wrong. I mean this place is phenomenal. It's an amazing country. The people here are wonderful. Sometimes they might be a little bit more introverted than what we're used to in America. And that's okay because once you break that ice with them, there's a whole culture and a whole life that that you'll find new and refreshing and bring new peace and new happiness into your life. I'm grateful that I've met this guy, man. He's awesome. We connected from the second he came up to me. This guy — he's just a super friendly guy and I'm grateful that I met him and now I've got a friend for life and I look forward to uh coming back here and I'm going to bring friends with me next time because you guys are not going to sit at home and give me crap and we're doing it. I came, I judged, and now I say it's fun and let's enjoy life together.

Serhiy That was Hank Miller, everybody. Thank you, man.

Hank Hey, you're welcome. Thank you.

Serhiy You're looking for a quality video production provider, look no further. My name is Sergey and I own Beverly Production. We are a video production agency from Ukraine. You know, we help entrepreneurs to create incredible online offline podcasts and clips that drive interest, you know, to promote your podcast. As a podcaster myself, I early realized that there are not that many podcasts that put an emphasis on quality and creativity, you know, just making your videos look really, really cool. That's why we mix our videos up with uh different visual aids, sound effects, flashy transitions. We do dynamic switching and other cool creative things that just set apart your podcast from your competition. You can check our samples on the website. And uh we also help people to post the videos. So we take over YouTube management and we can also run TikTok and LinkedIn for you. So if you're interested in something of this kind, don't hesitate to book a call with me. Uh the contacts are available on the website. Thanks a lot.